Have you been victim to the phrase, “But you don’t look ill”.
If so, how did it make you feel?
This recently happened to me and it refuelled my one man army battle cry with the want to take on the world again and dish out some, “For god sake, not all illnesses have to be visible” preaching.
I’m sure there are many of you who are only too familiar with the feeling of emptiness. The feeling of worry, the feeling of putting on fake happiness, the feeling of talking to yourself in your head.
Do I worry too much? Do I talk to myself in my head? Do I overthink?
God damn it I’m doing it now… I know I’m overthinking because I’m overthinking by telling myself not to overthink!
But you’re a genius remember! You know yourself the best right?
You tell yourself how to deal with whatever your overthinking about and still, somehow you feel ‘different’? By God, maybe I’m not a genius!
This to me is my invisible illness which I wish people could understand more.
I am telling you now, this invisible illness of never feeling good enough, always worrying and always stressing about everything in life is very common. We need to start educating people more by owning our invisible illnesses. Wear that tag girlfriend!
“Hi, my names Ryan and I have an invisible illness”, kind of pitch fork marches.
Ovbcourse, pitch fork marches are unnecessary but don’t be afraid to be open. Talk to people about how your feeling and confront your own thinking. I am so proud to have an invisible illness because do you know what, it makes me, me! Sprinkle some overthinking dust into a cauldron alongside some negative thinking powder and some sadness drops and POOF! You’ve created a Ryan.
The moment you become your own best friend and stop worrying about what people think about you is the moment you actually begin the road to no overthinking paradise. Learn how to take a step back and realise how blinking lucky we really are. Learn what’s really important in life and you’ll soon realise everything you used to overthink about is so irreverent. For me, by changing my mindset and concentrating on all my good qualities I have, actually distracts me from overthinking completely. I’m too busy being so god darn positive for my unconscious mind to throw me negative curve balls. The only balls you should be worrying about are chicken balls. Damn, chicken balls from my favourite Chinese are like my kryptonite. Give me a chicken ball and I’m yours 🙂 Right, back to my rant.
Ovbcourse you will have days which still don’t go so well as you’d expected, but remember that you need some bad days to enjoy the good. Be thankful for these bad days! For me, I’ve had a bad day as well as being told I don’t look ill. But then I took my step back. When this happens to you, remember to take your step back. Take that step back and remind yourself how far you’ve come. You used to be a crazy over thinker but now you’re a crazy over thinker who’s in control.
That’s enough ranting for one day but I just wanted to document to people and also myself, how anything negative can be turned into a positive!
Speak to ya’ll soon – I shall try to appear more ‘ill’ next time,